Want to get married? Its easy if you are in Bangalore on 14th Feb :D

Good News for love birds :)

If you are struggling to get married for quite sometime and are not able to do it for some reason; here is a lifetime opportunity for you. Parent disagreement, lack of cash, society disapproval nothing could stop you from getting married this Valentine Day.

All you need to do is roam around with your partner on the streets of Bangalore on 14th Feb and the rest will be done by Ram Sene.

Marriage Operandi in the words of Ram Sene is:

Those guys and gals exhibiting public display of affection on Valentine’s Day, beware. At a meeting on Wednesday, chaired by Sri Rama Sene leader Pramod Mutalik, Sene decided to arrange marriage between dating couples. For that, it has formed five teams. They will roam around Bangalore with a video camera and turmeric stub. If they find young couples dating, they will force them to wed on the spot. “The couples will be taken to a sub-registrar’s office to solemnize the marriage,’’ T S Vasanth Kumar Bhavani, Sene’s Bangalore city president, told TOI.

Read the complete article

Easy right!! Man marriage was never that easy....lol

If you are not in Bangalore; book your tickets now!! :)
All the Best!!

As I Mature

I have learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I have learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.

I have learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I have learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.

I have learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I have learned that the people you care most about in life are taken away from you too soon and all these less important ones just never go away.

Gandhi's Top 10 Fundamentals for Self Development

Though I am not a die hard fan of Gandhiji and don’t agree with all his principles. But I loved "Lage Raho Munnabhai" and agree with the philosophies filmed there. This particular article taken from Henrik Edberg’s book on Personal Development published on May, 2008 is lovely and had answered most of the doubts that I was having from the past few incidents so thought of posting it here.

Gandhi's Top 10 Fundamentals for Self Development

1. Change yourself.
'You must be the change you want to see in the world.'If you change yourself you will change your world.

2. You are in control.
'Nobody can hurt me without my permission.'What you feel and how you react to something is always up to you.

3. Forgive and let it go.
'The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.''An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.'

4. Without action you aren't going anywhere.
'An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching.'Taking action is hard and difficult.You have to take action and translate the knowledge into results and understanding.

5. Take care of this moment.
'I do not want to foresee the future. I am concerned with taking care of the present. God has given me no control over the moment following.'When you are in the present moment you don't worry about the next moment that you can't control anyway.

6. Everyone is human.
'I claim to be a simple individual liable to err like any other fellow mortal. I own, however, that I have humility enough to confess my errors and to retrace my steps.''It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.'
It's important to keep in mind that everyone is just a human being no matter who they are and that we are all human and prone to make mistakes. Be able to see with clarity where you went wrong and what you can learn from your mistake.

7. Persist.
'First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.'Be persistent. In time the opposition around you will fade and fall away.
Find what you really like to do. Then you'll find the inner motivation to keep going, going and going.

8. See the good in people and help them.
'I look only to the good qualities of men. Not being faultless myself, I won't presume to probe into the faults of others.''Leadership means getting along with people.'There is pretty much always something good in people. And things that may not be so good. But you can choose what things to focus on. And when you see the good in people it becomes easier to motivate yourself to be of service to them.

9 Be congruent, be authentic, be your true self.
'Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.''Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. Always aim at purifying your thoughts and everything will be well.'One of the best tips for improving your social skills is to behave in a congruent manner and communicate in an authentic way. People seem to really like authentic communication. And there is much inner enjoyment to be found when your thoughts, words and actions are aligned You feel powerful and good about yourself.

10. Continue to grow and evolve.
'Constant development is the law of life, and a man who always tries to maintain his dogmas in order to appear consistent drives himself into a false position.'You can pretty much always improve your skills, habits or re-evaluate your evaluations. You can gain deeper understanding of yourself and the world.

Qatil Song

I just loved this song - so practical and so true!!

It always happens; if you have broken off with someone it does hurt as much as it hurts to see that person happily going around with someone else. Especially if that someone is the reason of your break-off or if that is the person you hate the most.

Ideally, you should have nothing to do with the personal life of a person who is no more a part of your personal life. Like every other ideal situation this one is also very hard to achieve until and unless you also find someone to focus your mind. Then also it is equally hard to accept the person you loved so much in your life has gone to someone else's life and is not bothered about you. Remember, the restaurant scene of Pyaar ke Side Effects :)

Anyways, this is life and life doesn’t wait for anybody, it just moves on!!

Empowering others to ruin your day by reacting

I am writing this post in addition to my earlier post Garbage Trucks Psychology. I was thinking about this theory and have realized the simple fact when you are getting angry because of someone’s action; you are actually empowering the other person to be able to affect you.

As they rightly say that no one can disturb you without your own consent. Whenever you react on someone’s action/words that’s precisely what you do; you give him/her your own consent to disturb you.

It’s such a loser attitude to let someone else rule your life; to let someone else decide for your mood; to give away your mood, time and day to someone else.
So what should we do if someone is trying to ruin your happiness????
Maintain that calm and composed posture of yours. DON’T REACT. You be happy irrespective of what’s happening around you. This way not only you are in full control of your day but also you are sending this clear message to the other person – “Dude!!! I give a damn what you do; try as hard as you want you just can’t change a thing in my life”

Not reacting is the best answer you can give to people who want to hurt you.

Well that's my personal opinion from my experience.

Life is all about avoiding Cs

Confused??? :)
Yeah but its true; in order to lead a happy and fulfilling life; you have to avoid 3Cs in your life!!
They are:
a) Comparison
b) Complaining
c) Criticism

Comparison:
We are living in the competitive world today and our professional life is actually a rat race out there.
I am not sad because I have not bought a house for myself. May be I never felt the need for it as I want to be mobile for some more years; but it irks me a lot that most of my batchmates have already bought a house and only I am left.
I am ok with my raise but my colleague got more than me; I am equally qualified and experienced then why the disparity?
Why the hell I don’t have the killer looks that the other person have?
Sounds Familiar!!!!! :)
Trust me you are not the only one!!!!
Every person is a GOD’s unique creation with his/her own positives and negatives. Each one of us keeps on contributing to the universe all the time in our own unique way. Each one of us leads our lives in our own unique way irrespective of the fact how our relatives, friends and colleagues are leading.
Whenever we compare ourselves or our life with any one else; we don’t only insult ourselves but somewhere we challenge GOD’s creation and GOD’s decision for us. If you can follow the mantra – whatever happens; happens for good and GOD has some special plan for you and try to see the positive side of it; then nothing in this world can make you unhappy!!!!!
Feel special all the time because you truly are. If in doubt; ask your mother; how special you are and all your doubts will be gone :)
The only healthy comparison that I know of is - comparing how you are doing today Vs How were you doing yesterday?

Complaining:
Here; I would let Jack Welch do all the talking. As per his famous quote:
“Never Moan, Don’t be a victim. Either raise hell and change the game or get out of there.” – Jack Welch
Here again I will take most common example; couple of us keep on complaining about our respective jobs. The more we complain the more our brain register that the job in hand is not good. Simple logic – the more we talk; the more we think and eventually the more we believe. Our thoughts and words together will create so much of negative effect on our minds that we will stop appreciating interesting parts of our job as well.
So; either raise hell and get your profile / role (or whatever is troubling you) changed or quit the job and join somewhere else. But for your own sake’ don’t make complaining your daily routine. This holds true for any complaining routine that we might have.
Complaining obviously don’t help the situation but drain out all the positive energy from you. I am not sure whether you have noticed or not but you ought to feel weak and stressed after a long cribbing / complaining session. That’s because you tend to get angry; use bad words and get stressed while cribbing for something and these actions suck all your positive energy from your body.

Criticism:
Here I am talking about criticizing a person for the heck of it; I am not talking about the constructive feedback at all.
The most common example is whenever we criticize unnecessary when we discuss movies and bollywood stars. We don’t take it as just another entertainment service and attach our emotions with them. The ones we don’t like we criticize them whole heartedly. The ones we are criticizing is not even aware of it and is unaffected by it and we have ended up not only spending our precious time but we have converted our valuable positive energy into negative energy.
It’s good to give critical feedback to the person who is related to you; that’s how you can grow your team, your friends, and your family. Criticizing someone; who is not even related to you and becoming emotional about it; is a total waste of time and energy.
We don’t realize but every negative thought, word and action keeps on registering in our mind and start reflecting in our behavior and it has a very long term effect on us. By being nice to people we are not doing any favor to anyone; we are doing a big favor to ourselves. We are creating a very positive life and environment around us.
The way you behave; The way you think; The way you treat others– everything is inter-related and finally decides your life at large.

If suddenly you are feeling depressed without any reason; understand it’s the negative energy at work that you might have accumulated for some period of time.

Fokat ka Advice

There is this colleague cum friend of mine; who loves to give fokat ka advice and maintains a blog as well.

He is a happy go lucky person, I have never seen him agitated, angry, depressed, worried or sad. I have never heard him saying anything bad about anyone or cribbing about anything. He has no friends and no enemies and he is always very busy with himself without worrying about anyone or anything at all.

I keep on wondering, how can someone be like this? How can someone lead such an emotionless life? I mean you got to be attached to someone; you got to be angry with someone; you got to be feeling bad about something. How can you be giggling all the time?

I could not resist the temptation and finally one day I asked him; what’s the reason; why he is like that?He gave me the following mantras that he follows very religiously to be like what he is:

a) No Expectation policy

Have no expectation from any one – personal or professional. Don’t expect anything even from your parents. Accept the fact that everyone has his/her own life and no one has any time for you. The root cause of feeling bad most of the times is that someone failed to match your expectation. Having no expectation not only will save you from many misunderstanding; it will also give you exponential happiness when someone will do anything for you as you would have never expected that.

b) Be an extremist

Either believe in GOD or don’t believe in HIM at all. Don’t believe half heartedly. Either take complete control of your life and don’t expect anything from HIM at all or leave everything on HIM and stop worrying. It does not mean that you should stop making efforts but stop reacting on results. As you believe that nothing is in your control and the best thing you can do is to put in best efforts; then you will do just that and stay happy.

c) Chose an ideal and start behaving like that

Most of the times we are sad because we want to achieve something or we want to be like someone and we are far away from our goal. Start behaving like the person you want to be 6 months down the line today. This will keep you motivated to reach your goal faster and keep you confident today.

d) Work on yourself

Keep on working on yourself all the time – personally and professionally. The more you groom yourself the more you are accepted by other people and the more confident you feel about yourself. It’s a great self booster when you are accepted and appreciated by people around.So these 4 rules are his mantras to lead a happy and emotionless (read negative emotion) life. I am not sure how much is practical to adopt in life but yes I agree with all the points and I am going to work on them for sure.

Have written this post to pass on the fokat ki advice ;)